The non communication between Michael's parents and Mr. Sexy and I drives me up the wall. I'm sure it would most people. From what I hear, co-parenting is never easy. I get that. Except for one thing. Co-parenting has the term, "co," in it. As in together. Working as team. Talking to each other. Discussing issues at home or at school.
There is no "co" in our co-parenting system. At least that's how it feels most of the time. For instance:
Two days ago was the cookie dough pick up day. I was really proud of Michael for partcipating in the fundraiser this year and he had goals of how much he wanted to sell in order to receive prizes. I picked up his two boxes and headed home proudly. Soon after I got a call from his dad. Apparantley we picked up his cookie dough as well. I was confused because I didn't see any names from that set of parents on the order form.
Upon opening the box I found an order form - however it wasn't one I had seen. It from Michael's dad's family and friends. I realized I picked up their cookie dough instead of ours.
Frustrating.
Because Michael had two order forms, there was no accumulation of prizes. He missed out. Michael missed out on something good because his dad wasn't able to share information with me.
I'm still upset about it. I feel like Michael was wronged. I feel like he was let down. I feel like letting go of the "co" in parenting as Michael's other parents seem to do so often.
But I won't. I'm better than that. Mr. Sexy is better than that.
Today, I'm still fighting for the "co" in parenting.
Thanks for reading my unedited, unashamed 5 minutes of writing on the word: Still
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FMF neighbor stopping by ... I am so sorry you are experiencing this. There was no such thing as "co"parenting when my first marriage ended so long ago; my boys were very little; and the end of that marriage was a necessary thing for safety purposes. That said it's never easy and I am praying. You, however, are doing great, from what I can read. Just know this, there comes a day when our children see us for the parents we are, and let's hope Michael's other parents figure that out before it's too late - for them and for Michael. Blessings to you. Oh and thanks for the props on my blog. =)
ReplyDeleteGrr, I wrote a long, lovely comment, and it got munched. Sympathy here. :)
ReplyDeleteSo hard! I pray that you find a way to truly co-parent. And I don't blame you for being upset. I think you are right Michael did miss out. Communication is so key to any relationship, isnt it? Blessings to you!
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine how frustrating this would be. Especially since it really isn't that hard a thing to do in the first place. SHM. I know my own mother had to make a clean break after divorce because there was no concept of the "co" for my dad either. I am almost certain I am better off for it, but it must have been hard at times for my mom to keep the high road.
ReplyDeleteOh goodness, I totally relate to your post....I'm in the middle of a custody decision and it's a living nightmare....misinformation, telling tales, belittling...it's really and truly awful - for the littles most of all.I feel for your son so, so much (and, of course, for you - as you say, these things stay with you for days, because of the pettiness and unfairness of it all....why make life so complicated when things could be so much simpler??!!!)
ReplyDeleteIt is really hard for kids to have two sets of parents. It's hard on the parents. But it is hardest on the kids. Try to hold it all together for Michael. Because in the long run he is all that really matters in the equation.
ReplyDeleteHow sad for Michael! It's too bad that his other parents don't realize that their failure to work together with you doesn't just hurt you, it hurts him.
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