Monday, January 20, 2014

Changing Perspective

Today I slept in because I was so tired.  This means I missed my shower and when I miss my shower that means I plan to stay home all day so why change out of my sweats and t-shirt I wore to bed?  Forget putting on makeup and brushing my hair.

Today the kitchen is a little messier than when I woke up this morning and the dining room is only slightly less cluttered.

Today I got caught up on Revenge (guilty pleasure) and took an online quiz to see which Grey's Anatomy character I am.  The quiz told me I'm April Kepner.  Eww!  I really, really don't like her character.  I think I should be more of a Meredith or a Callie.  I like tequila AND I like to dance around in my underwear (in the privacy of my own home of course.)

Today I showed Denai some of her new toys, tried coaxing her into crawling until she got mad and fed her to her hearts content.

Today I worked on Social Studies with Marie.  We spent our entire school day working on getting through half one lesson.

And lastly, today I did laundry.

I feel lazy, unaccomplished and bum-like.

As I read down my list of "accomplishments" I see a lazy-ass.  But then I get towards the bottom and I realize how much time and effort I put into my kids.  Yet I still feel lazy, unaccomplished and bum-like.

I wanted to get up on time and shower because it makes me feel good, clean and ready for the day.

I wanted to get the kitchen cleaned up and organize the dining room.

I wanted to either work on my blog or organize our work spaces downstairs.

I wanted to see Denai crawl.

I wanted Marie to get through one lesson.  Just one.

I tend to be driven by tangible accomplishments and victories.  So the fact that I spent most of my day working with Marie and I wasn't able to click "Lesson Completed" shows the world (in my mind) that nothing got accomplished.  All that can be seen is an un-showered mom, a baby who was also in pj's all day, a messy kitchen and an open Facebook page (with loads of laundry in the background).

In reality I actually accomplished a lot.  I spent the entire day sitting with Marie at her computer!  I was patient while she struggled through some harder words as she read her lesson.  I occupied myself as she cut out her study notecards.  I persevered through the laborious process of note-taking.

For the most part my accomplishments today are not tangible.  Some victories will only be shared between Marie and myself.  I'm learning that that's okay.  It's okay that I don't always get dressed and that I didn't sweep the chips off the floor.

It's okay that the biggest victories today were purely relational.


  1. Hey! I thought I would reciprocate and visit you. Can I tell you a secret? Most days I never get out of my yoga pants - sometimes I barely get my teeth brushed. You'll find your rhythm soon with homeschooling but WOW! You also have a baby (I don't.) so that counts for more grown up points! Keep going for it! You'll be great at homeschooling. You're the best teacher your child can ever have! :)

  2. So proud of you for finding the positive side of your lazy day. Did Tuesday go any better with Social Studies?

    1. We haven't finished the lesson yet. We're getting there though.

  3. I'm still in pj's == it's almost 10 pm. by the time I got the kids to bed I figured; no point changing out of them now. I've been in them all day. Any my kids go to school. But I did laundry. read some blogs. Today my accomplishments were all about me. And sometimes, that's okay too.

  4. Some days it's okay to be "lazy". I'll stay in my lounge pants or basketball shorts as long as I can. That's where I feel most comfortable. It's not always the big things that are victories. Even the small things count.

    1. Yeah, for sure! Personally, at least changing my shirt helps me feel better and ready for the day. Although I think part of that has to do with winter weather here. Coffee can only take me so far. :)


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