Wednesday, January 29, 2014

I'm No Pinterest Mom

It's official.  I've got my hands full.

I'm homeschooling Marie who has down syndrome and we have a hard time understanding each other.  Now we have added full-time schooling into our lives.

Then there is almost-10-month old Denai who is finally on the brink of crawling.  She LOVES me.  She loves me so much she always wants to be with me.  ALWAYS.  And when she's with me she needs something because that's what I do.  I give her what she needs.  This largely consists of bread and boobs.  (She eats more than just bread but it's her FAVORITE thing right now.  She goes CrAzY over it.)    

And I have Michael who only gets to live with us half the time.  It's nice to have a break from taking Mr. Sexy to work every morning so I can take Michael to school and then pick him up three hours later.  It's nice to get a break from the tantrums and attitude that I completely blame his biological dad for (I promise to take all the blame for Denai's behavior).  When he's home my life usually feels a little more strained because he is an extra person needing something from me.  But gosh-darn-it I love that kid.  He adds a level of energy in our house that is missing when he's gone.

I say all this because today is a day where I almost freaked out.  Like really freaked out.  Crying, yelling, rum...you name it.  Like I said I ALMOST freaked out.  This means that I didn't!  I held myself together.  For the most part.

I felt completely emotionally overrun and at a standstill in that.  I couldn't move forward.  Therefore I couldn't think right.  Therefore what was starting to come out was a nasty person with a tongue of fire.

I stopped our day for the night (it was getting to be later afternoon anyways) and was able to chill for a few minutes which helped clear my head.

I am trying to do everything at one time.  

While Marie is reading through her lesson - over and over and over again - I'm playing around on my blog.  But I can't focus because I still want to correct Marie when she needs help with reading.  I try to do some laundry but that doesn't work because I'm too far away from Marie's screen meaning I can't help guide her very well.  I try to clean and organize our work spaces in here but I just end up picking up small things at random, staring at them, then putting them down again.  I have no focus whatsoever.

That basically sums up my every day of the homeschool life.

It must stop.

So I am in the process of making a plan and setting some new rules.  I really like rules.  Rules are there to help and are not supposed to be broken.  Ever.  Unless there is an amazing reason which always shows up in the movies.

I made my school schedule - finally - and it should stay the same when Michael is home.  After I made it, however, I became really nervous because according to my schedule there is no time for anything extra.  When would I clean the kitchen?  Fold the laundry? Vacuum?  Sweep?  Finish unpacking from our move this summer?

While I can indeed do some chores in the evening that isn't a good plan for me.  I need time to make dinner, spend some time with Mr. Sexy and then get the kids ready for bed.  My kids take some effort, let me tell you!  I also need some veg time to watch TV or blog or sit on the couch and stare out the windows for no reason at all.

This means EVERYONE must pitch in and we must ALL do chores on the weekends.  Awesome right?

So far I think I have a good plan and I am open for tweaking it as much as needed to fit our family.

Hopefully my new plan will help tomorrow go better, and Friday, and all of next week!

2 comments:

  1. One of the most successful professors on campus once mentioned at a reading group that she became successful partly because she let herself stop caring so much about how the house looked. I remind myself of that a lot as my blood pressure starts to rise as I look around my house after working all day and see the mess no one else wants to help me clean. It's nice to know there are other people who won't judge me when I can't quite do it all. :)

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    1. Oh my gosh Rami. I so want to be the pinterest mom with the beautiful photos artistically covering the walls. But who am I kidding. I have a set of frames from Black Friday, 2012, that have never held pictures although they were once hung on the wall. lol Whatever. We can't do it all right? I think we pick and choose where our energy goes. My house and the dead bugs in the window sills and crumbs all over the floor definitely do not take priority...until I have a party. ;)

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